Worrying is a problem in my life. I am learning to manage my anxiety but
sometimes it comes when I least expect it.
Each person suffering from anxiety has their own triggers that set them
off. Mine? I worry about the
future. I guess you could say that I am
more pessimistic than optimistic. And
yes, it has created issues in my life that have taught me great, yet much
needed lessons.
I recently experienced events that triggered some major
anxiety. Actually, to the level that I
never experienced before. I had my first
panic attack after being involved in a car accident. I have always been very cautious on the
road. Trust is an issue for me and I
don’t trust other drivers. I look in my
rear view mirror often to make sure the other driver is an adequate distance
from me. Usually when I am the passenger I tend to be more at ease. But, ironically, that is when the accident
happened. A friend and I were having a conversation and all of a sudden… BOOM…
we were rear-ended. My worries had become
reality.
This accident was the cake topper for a few other negative
experiences I’ve had the last few months including dealing with my own health
issues. I had been feeling sick for a while and I just wasn’t getting better.
And because I tend to be more pessimistic, my mind went into irrational
thinking patterns. To add fuel to the
fire, I made a wrong choice and researched online (not just once but I kept
going back) some of the symptoms I was experiencing. Of course, the worst case
scenarios came up at the top of the Google search. That sent me through a
loop.
I was so worried that I had some dramatic disease that would
possibly disable me or worse, take my life.
You see, I recently saw my sweet dog Simon all of a sudden become
paralyzed after having some back pain. And earlier in my life, my father found
out he had cancer in his later 50’s and ended up passing away just a year and a
half later. I was scared that something was going to happen to me also. These thoughts gave me nightmares. And, the times I
was awake, I was worring. The thoughts affected
my daily living. They created an
imbalance in my life. The reality was that I was just fine. Nothing that a little rest, time, and the
right medications couldn’t fix.
Anxiety is something you can’t just shake. The mind is in a fight or flight state and
the body does what it needs to in order to survive. It is normal and even
healthy to experience occasional anxiety.
It is a type of stress that pushes us to get things done and work
through traumatic events. It helps us to
solve problems and even reveals what is most important to us. We should be
anxiously engaged in good causes. “But you may experience anxiety that is
persistent, seemingly uncontrollable, and overwhelming. If it’s an excessive,
irrational dread of everyday situations, it can be disabling,” says the Anxiety
and Depression Association of America.[1]
Being stuck in this frame of mind is miserable. I have found that when I am in
a state of anxiety, I lack truth. My
mind has an outlook based on ideas that are assumed, not proven. When I find myself viewing life from this
perspective, I have learned the remedy is one simple word: faith.
We know that faith is things that are hoped for that are
true but not seen. In my case, I get
anxious when I fear what the future might bring based on certain negative experiences. So, I guess you could say that my faith
wavers at times. But, honestly, that is part of being human and something we
are learning to strengthen. In my journey with faith, I have learned that it is
a product of hope and trust. Without hoping
for then trusting in what is true, we cannot have faith.
Faith takes a lot of effort.
In fact, it is an action. To have faith, we must do things in our
control to show that we trust what is true and real. For example, we have faith each night we go
to sleep that the next day will come because we set our alarm to wake up. Or, we have faith that we will pass an exam
because we prepare for it by studying. When we take these action steps we are
taking control over our situation. We are removing the fear and replacing it
with faith. Fear causes misery and
anxiety. But faith is the optimistic
approach to living life based on truth.
Faith is not something we wake up one morning and say to
ourselves, “Today I will have faith” and then expect to be anxiety free. No, just like anything in life that is good,
it takes time and lots of practice. I am learning to take experiences and see
them for what they really are. Just
because something bad happens (life is full of hardships) does not mean that
the worst case scenario will be the result of it. Instead, I know I can take
the next step to move things in a better direction. I become the agent of
control over the situation instead of being acted a pone.
I have also learned that just because something is hard now
doesn’t mean that it will say that way forever. It is irrational to think that
change will never occur. Change is a
part of life. We always have control
over how we will react to change and what we will do about it. (I talk about
that in more detail in another article I wrote called Change is Inevitable… Do you build a wall or a windmill?) But thinking optimistically then acting a pone
it certainly helps reduce anxiety when dealing with negative experiences. I heard about the interesting difference in
behavior between cows and buffalo at a conference I recently went to. They teach an important lesson regarding the
storms of in lives and how to deal with them.
Colorado has a beautiful landscape that has both the
mountains from the Rocky Mountain Range and plains the Kansas Plains. Because of this unique landscape, there are a
few places where both cows and buffalo live in close proximity. Many storms
come through Colorado and the cows and buffalo act completely different.
The storms roll from west to east. When the cows see a storm they are scared and
try to run away from it. They do their
best to avoid it but we all know that cows are not very fast. What happens is that the storm eventually
catches up with them. They end up running
with the storm and therefore suffering the pain and frustration of the storm
longer.
The buffalo, on the other hand, does just the opposite. When they see the storm coming, they run
towards the storm and face it head on. Since they are running the opposite
direction, the amount of time they must endure the same storm as the cows, including
the pain and frustrations that goes with it, is shortened.
I have lived much of my life running from the storms, just
like the cows. I do my best to avoid situations and while trying to avoid them
I am caught in a world of worry and pain.
My anxiety rises. But, I am
learning to take the example of the buffalo. When I find truth in what is
happening and do all I can to solve the problem, I am act like the
buffalo. I reduce my anxiety and
therefore experience less pain and sorrow.
Anxiety is a real issue that many people suffer with. It is scary and full of uncertainty. However, I believe that just like many
physical ailments we can heal. Life is
full of many beautiful and pleasant experiences. Even the “winters” of our lives can be
beautiful if we learn to see it. Faith
is the key to taking pessimism out of our lives and managing our anxiety. Through faith, we can heal.
Worrying is a problem in my life. Pessimism, a contributor to my anxiety will
always surface now and then. But the joy is that I get to do something about
it. Winnie the Pooh teaches that when we look on the brighter side, life is
always more pleasant and therefore easier to manage. Sure, anxiety will not
completely go away. If it did, that
would cause an imbalance too. But I can
choose to think more optimistically and live in the present. Like Winnie the
Pooh says, “Today is my favorite day.”
