When feeling insignificant, remember this....

                                                      Photo by Pedro Lastra on Unsplash

The world has billions of people all doing their own thing.  Some get recognized for their efforts and some don’t. Those of us who don’t may feel insignificant. We may think, "What have I got to offer?" We feel small in this space populated with so many people (past and present). And all we want to do is make a mark on the world... we want our lives to matter.  However, we are overwhelmed when we think of the amount of people who have, now, and will live. So many that it is comparable to the sand of the sea: countless.

In a culture caught up in competition and comparison, we may feel that even though we may have talents and abilities, what we have to offer is not good enough. I felt this way. I was always the shy girl in to corner that nobody noticed. I felt that my ideas, comments, actions, and accomplishments didn’t matter. And worse, I lived like I believed it. Last year I wrote a song called “My Gethsemane” that describes that very feeling. In the third verse I wrote:

Now on Earth, not sure of the task

The trial and strain I desperately mask

Am I of worth in this great plan?

Faith and trust, do not know if I can

My downfall? Lack of faith and trust.  Just like most of us, I have been hurt many times in my life. However, I allowed my lack of faith and trust to weaken with every hurt. I didn't trust people or situations and therefore didn't believe I was wanted. I allowed myself to feel more and more insignificant each time I faced a failure or rejection. This thinking only hurt me because it wasn't true. I was slowly self-destructing not giving myself a chance to reach my full potential. That is, until I came to realize something very important: All I am and do does matters.

I learned that to leave your mark in the world, you start with just one person.

A few years ago, I received a gift from the school district I was working for. It was a key chain shaped as a starfish with the words "One Person Can Make a Difference." Inside the box, was the following story:

One morning a man walked along a beach covered with thousands of starfish that had washed up during a storm. Now they lay dying in the sun. He saw a young girl picking up the starfish one by one and tossing them into the sea. As he approached her he count't help but ask, "Why bother? There are too many of them. You won't make much of a difference." She picked up another starfish and tossed it into the water. Then she turned to the man and said, "I made a difference to that one."

As we go through life, we never know who we influence. I think we don't truly grasp the reality of the difference we make. This past year I taught a student who was struggling. I decided to look at the situation as an opportunity to treat someone with love, patience, and hope. Some days were tough and others were good. At the end of the year, I read from his mother how through my choices to treat him as Christ would, I did more that I realized. She wrote:

"Miss Ward has taken my son who started kindergarten at level zero because he was so delayed. My son is now on track and ready to end the year above where he should be. I have watched him grow and learn so much from Miss Ward and I couldn't ask for a better teacher to teach my son. She has made a major impact on my family's life and we can't tell her enough how much we appreciate her."

It humbles me each time I read these sweet words this mother wrote. Again it starts with just one....

Christ, our Savior and great example, never allowed feelings of insignificance stop him from loving on each person, one at a time. He knew who he was and the importance of his service. At the beginning of his mortal ministry Jesus returned to his home town to minister to, or serve, his people. While hearing a sermon, he stood up and declared He was the Messiah. The people could and would not believe what he was saying.  Wasn't he the carpenter Joseph's son? However, he continued to serve to those who would allow him to. He focused on one person at a time.

The world has us thinking we need recognition to have any kind of significance in this world. It tells us that in order to be someone we must win at competition and be loved by all. However, Christ taught us different. He taught that it is by the small and simple acts of love that we truly make a difference in this world. When you show love one by one, you can feel the true impact you have in this world because to that "one", you just may have changed their world.

The Healing Effects of Gratitude

Thank you is a common phrase in just about every language. Some languages have multiple ways to say it. Most people can say thank you not only in their home language but in at least one other. It was one of the first phrases I knew when learning German. It seems to be one of the core words to learn when starting to learn a new language. I wondered why. It doesn’t seem like an easier word to say or even learn. Maybe it’s because “Thank You” is a nice thing to say. Or maybe it’s something more.

Since we were young, we have been told to say thank you because it is the polite the thing to do. Sadly, I have noticed that even though we are taught to say thank you, as we age, people seem to say it with empty meaning or not at all. Gratitude is a virtue that is increasingly diminishing in our society. Stress and entitlement replace it.  At the same time, there is alarming amounts of illness that plague our earth. The power in the simple phrase “Thank You” has become more real to me lately. In searching for healing with my own illnesses and tragedies, I found out that gratitude is not just a polite thing to do, it has amazing healing powers.

There is much research that stress is a root cause of many diseases.  And if it isn’t the root cause, well, it sure contributes to it. Stress on the body happens in a few ways: physical, emotional, and mental. We can experience stress even when we are unaware that it is happening. In his book, “When the Body Says No”, Dr. Gabor Mate defines stress as a “biological process, a wide-ranging set of events in the body, irrespective of cause or of subjective awareness.  Stress consists of the internal alteration- visible or not- that occur when the organism perceives a threat to its existence or well-being.”[i]  Or in other words, when the body feels threatened by a virus, situation, action, thought, person, etc. we experience stress. The body is amazing and protects itself by telling the immune system to start the stress response. Sometimes this is the “fight or flight” mode or in case of a virus or toxin, the body signals the T-fighter cells to kick into action. This is a great thing when we get right to solving the threat. But, in today’s society we live in our stress. We are either taught to “tough it out”, are bombarded with toxins in the air we breathe and food we eat, and/or don’t have the problem solving skills necessary to ease the burden. We just go on, day to day, in a state of stress that to us, feels normal.

The problem with living in our stress is that it keeps cortisol levels at a constant high and we eventually experience chronic inflammation throughout the body. This inflammation leads to heart disease (the number one killer in the U.S.A.), cancer, depression, anxiety, auto-immune diseases, and just about every other disease we know of. It alters the balance of the gut flora (the bacteria) in our intestines. About 80% of the immune system is in the gut. These bacteria interact with the immune system to help keep us healthy. Part of their job is to signal the Tregg cells in the immune system.  These cells go in and calm down the T-Fighter cells so the body can go back down into a state of rest. So when the good bacteria are disrupted, things can go awry with our bodies and inflammation can persist. This is just what has happened in my body.

I have been living in a state of stress for who knows how long. I, too, was a victim to our everyday “normal” living. Like most of us, I experienced some rough patches in my life. I thought I was eating correctly but wasn’t. (Our Western Diet has us confused with what is healthy.  They prepackage foods and slap a label saying it has the healthy benefits of this or that. We buy it and as a result, our bodies struggle to process it causing inflammation.) And, I’ve allowed others to treat me poorly. I allowed it because I learned to be a peacemaker and didn’t want to cause contention. This is ironic because there definitely was contention within my own mind. To manage the stress, I pushed my feeling down and never expressed them. I thought they’d just go away. But I was very wrong. Feelings just don’t go away. They come out in some form or another. For me, it was my health.

My poor choices caught up with me and I have been struggling with some health issues.  My neck and shoulders are often tight and stiff. In fact, I have woken up a few times noticing my jaw clenched or my shoulders tensed. When I exercise I notice my body tense and this is supposed to be something that relieves stress.  I have been frustrated with how my body is reacting. But it’s just trying to do what it needs to survive. I am working on learning to relax but this is easier said than done! Needless to say, I have struggled in the healing process.

Neale Donald Walsh said, “The struggle ends when gratitude begins.” Just like myself, we all struggle. That in inevitable in this mortal existence. Struggling can be good. It’s when learning occurs. But when it goes on too long, exhaustion, frustration, anxiety and depression set in. I have gotten there a few times (or more). Sadly, this is the breaking point for many and they end up giving up. I don’t think it’s because they want to, rather, they just don’t have the knowledge and tools to solve their problems. They (as I did) ask: How do I gain strength to preserver? How can I find peace? How do I heal from all the wounds rooted from my tragedy and the consequences that caused me to struggle? Mr. Walsh summed it up: we practice gratitude.

On the wall in my front room hangs the saying, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues…. but the parent of all the others.” Who said it, I don’t know.  However, it has a great impact. To be the “parent of all others” means that all other virtues stem from this single quality. “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. . . . Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”[ii]

We often label emotions as negative or positive. But, it reality, emotions are chemical reactions to the way the body is feeling in conjunction to the circumstances. When we have feelings such as anger, fear, anxiety, and insecurity we produce cortisol, adrenaline, and norepinephrine, the chemicals our body makes when we are stressed. However, if we take those feelings and process them in a healthy way, we can turn them into feelings of forgiveness, trust, peace, and security. These feelings produce the chemicals opioid neuropeptides (a.k.a endorphins), serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin. These chemicals work together to lower our stress levels and make us happy. Gratitude is the key that opens the door to process our anger into forgiveness, fear into trust, anxiety into peace, and insecurity into security.   

In my daily prayers, I thank my Heavenly Father for all the little things I have been given. I thank Him for the struggles I have encountered and the things I have learned because of them. I talk to Him about a plan to make difficult things lighter and ask Him to shoulder that burden with me. I thank Him for His support and growth in my life. I thank Him for all He blesses me with including my talents, loved ones, job, experiences and opportunities, and so much more. With His help, I am learning to process stressful emotions into peaceful emotions through gratitude.

We are told in the scripture that gratitude it pleasing to God. While thanking Him for all we have, it also shows faith in what we hope for. It acts as a trust in God that He will grant unto us those things we mostly desire because we know that if they are good, we will receive them. Christ talked to the people in the Americas after His resurrection about how much our Heavenly Father loves us and wants to give us good things. He said, “Ask, and it shall be given unto you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be open unto you. For every one that asketh, receiveth; and he that seeketh, findeth; and to him that knocketh, it shall be opened. Or what man is thereof you, who if his son ask bread, will give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?”[iii]

I have been given some great ways to heal from not only my muscle tension but from a few other things I am working on. Gratitude has allowed me to improve my eating. I am so grateful for the beautiful array of good, wholesome, real food available.  I now eat mainly “clean”. No processed food. I am working to heal my gut and my immune system so I can manage stress more effectively. Since the body and mind work together this is a great piece in healing from the inside out.

Gratitude has also allowed me to share my feelings more instead of “keeping the peace”. There have been some difficult circumstances to deal with but I come out feeling better of myself. I have learned that if people don’t like what I have to say and can’t talk it out, it’s better to leave them in their opinion. As a result, I am gaining my voice and my confidence. I am healing.

Zig Ziglar, an author and emotional speaker, said, “Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.”  I have learned just that and more. Gratitude is healing. It allows one to gain power over their own life. It attracts forgiveness and promotes healing and growth. With each step we take with gratitude, we achieve small victories. When we put those small victories together we can achieve that which is great. And to me, that is why saying thank you is more than just a polite thing to do.  

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[i] Mate, Gabor M.D. When the Body Says No. Turner Publishing: Nashville, Tennessee, 2003. Page 28.

[ii] Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency (Center City, Minnesota: Hazelden, 1990), 218.

[iii] 3 Nephi 14: 7-11

Oatmeal Apple Muffins and a Bit on How Clean Eating Helps Heal Disease

Healthy eating has always been an interest of mine.  I have sought out healthy foods and enjoyed them. But it wasn't until I ran into some heath issues that I started diving into what foods are truly healthy and why. Our food industry has changed from local farms where it would feed neighborhood or towns to world wide mass food production that would feed, well, the world basically.  This has led to unhealthy food disguised as healthy. So many additives and sugars are put into our food to preserve it, and its making us sick. So, I started to take charge of my own health with the goal to give my body the nutrients it needs to function properly.
I recently read a book called "Eat to Beat Disease" by William W. Li, MD. He discusses five defenses your body is equipped with to fight disease. The amazing thing is that all five defenses are influenced by the food we eat. The five natural defense systems are angiogenesis (where your body makes new blood vessels for healing), regeneration (the stem cell production to repair a broken organ), microbiome (the community of bacteria that controls the chemical reactions our body responds to), DNA protection (the make up of our body and how it works to make our body function properly), and immunity (the 3 cell types of T-cells, B-cells, and Tregg cells and how they must be balanced to function properly). In referring to these 5 defense systems, Dr. William Li says:

"There is no "silver bullet" for any one disease or for overall health and longevity. No single factor in our life is going to prevent sickness. But my research shows we have something even better. There is a way to boost our own defense systems, so the body will heal itself. These revelations tell us that we have radically underestimated our power to transform and restore our own health."

This "way" that he talks about is food. By eating a clean, balanced diet, in addition to physical exercise, reducing our stress levels, and good medical care we can help our bodies protect themselves and even heal from diseases.
In my quest to become healthier, I have searched for recipes that incorporates a plant based diet with a few good meats and of course good old fashion plain yogurt. In doing that, I have found a recipe for oatmeal apple muffins that I modified to make my own. They have amazing healthy benefits with oatmeal, apples, cloves, honey, flax and chia seeds, and coconut products. When I ate one, I was in heaven. It proves that clean food is so much more tasty, enjoyable, and satisfying than anything you can buy already made from a factory.
Don't believe me? Try it yourself.

Oatmeal Apple Muffins

Makes 6 large or 12 regular muffins

3 cups oatmeal
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt (use sea salt or pink Himalayan salt for better health benefits)
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp cloves
2 TBSP chia seeds
3 TBSP ground flax seed
1 cup unsweetened apple sauce
1/3 cup full fat coconut milk
1/3 cup extra virgin coconut oil
1/4 cup raw honey

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place two cups of oatmeal in a blender. Blend until it turns into a flour. Place oat flour and 1 cup oatmeal in a large bowl. Mix in baking soda, salt, cinnamon, cloves, chia and flax seeds until well blended. Add apple sauce, honey, and the coconut milk and oil then mix. Mixture will be wet. Do not over mix. In a muffin tin with either muffin cups or is greased with coconut oil, place mixture in each cup. Place in oven to bake for 25 minutes. Muffins will be done when toothpick inserted comes out clean. Remove from oven and transfer muffins to wire rack to cool.
I like to top them with a bit of honey.

Pete the Cat and the Cool Cat Boogie

Pete the Cat....a cat with a suave, carefree attitude. But then, we learn that even Pete allows the criticism of others to get in the way of his confidence. I absolutely adore this book and not only because it is about dance.  However, that is what caught my eye.  It teaches a valuable lesson that in all we do we must be ourselves.  There is so much critique from friends, family and of course the world. But it wont be until we learn to do be ourselves that we find our happy grove.

Pete the Cat was learning a new dance—  the COOL Cat Boogie! Then Grumpy Toad came along. “I really dig that song but Pete, you dance all wrong!” Pete did not know what to say. He just tuned and walked away.

Pete couldn’t sleep at all that night! “What if Grumpy Toad was right? What if my moves are bad?” The thought of NOT dancing made Pete feel sad. “Dancing is like magic! When I hear a groovy beat I’m full of happy in my feet! I won’t give up!  I love to dance. Let me give it one more chance.”

Pete was practicing the Cool Cat Boogie when he saw Squirrel. “Hey, Squirrel, How do you dance? How do you groove? Can you teach me how to move?” “Sure, Pete! It’s a simple song. Just cha-cha-cha and dance along!” “Ahhhhh! Ouch! Pete, you stepped on my toes! That’s not how this dance goes!” Pete did not know what to say. He just turned and walked away.

“But dancing is like magic! When I hear a groovy beat I’m full of HAPPY in my feet! I won’t give up! I love to dance. Let me give it one more chance.”

Pete was still practicing the Cool Cat Boogie when Gus came along. “Hey, Gus! How do you dance? How do you groove? Can you teach me how to move?” “Sure, Pete! It’s a simple song. Just do a robot and dance along!” “Ouch, Pete, you bopped my on the nose! That is not how this dance goes!” Pete did not know what to say. He just turned and walked away.

“But dancing is like magic! When I hear a groovy beat I’m full of HAPPY in my feet! I won’t give up! I love to dance. Let me give it one more chance.”

Pete was still trying to do the Cool Cat Boogie when Turtle came along. “Hey, Turtle! How do you dance? How do you groove? Can you teach me how to move?” “Sure, Pete! It’s a simple song. Just shake your tail and dance along!” “Oh no! Pete, you fell! You tripped over my shell! Everybody knows that’s not how this dance goes!” Pete felt like giving up.

Wise Old Owl had been watching from his tree. “Pete, it doesn’t matter how you move as long as you are being you!” “You are right!!! I never want to miss a chance to dance!”

“When you hear a groovy beat and you feel happy in your feet, just dance, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE.” 

Dean, Kimberly and James. Pete the Cat and the Cool Cat Boogie. Harper Publishers: NY. 2017.

Get this book here

Love the Savior's Way

A lawyer once asked Jesus what the greatest commandment was. Out of all he could have chosen, the Savior chose the two that centered on love. He said, "Thous shalt love the Lord they God with all they hear, and with all they soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. The second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." (Matthew 22:37-39)

Love allows people to do more than they though was possible. One such miracle is the ability to heal. It also gives us the opportunity to become like our Savior. In Gethsemane, Christ preformed the ultimate act of love. He atoned for our sins that we may be forgiven and therefore work towards becoming like Him. Christ forgives us of our sins, so we too must show that same act of love when others do wrong to us. We are all imperfect. We all desire to be shown love and respect, despite our faults.

When and adulterous women was brought before Jesus, he asked those who have not sinned to cast the first stone. No stones were thrown. Christ showed that love helps us accept others despite their short comings. Just as we are commanded to love others, we are also commanded to love ourselves. Love yourself despite your short comings. We tend to judge ourselves harshly. Be kind and allow the love of the Savior to heal your wounds as you also love and forgive yourself.  

How to Act in Faith

We learn in Alma that “if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true.” (Alma 32:21) Faith is the combination of hope and works.  If either of those were absent in the equation then it wouldn’t be faith.  We show faith in our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ by obeying the commandments, making and keeping covenants, and following the Spirit when prompted.  Moroni said concerning faith in a prayer, “O Lord, thy righteous will be done, for I know that thou workest unto the children of men according to their faith…; wherefore thou workest after men have faith.” (Ether 12:29-30) This tells me that we must first do all we can.  Sometimes when our righteous desire has not come to pass after doing so much, we wondering if we have done enough. These are the times we must then let go and allow our Savior to take over. Joseph Smith said, “Therefore, dearly beloved brethren [and sisters], let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power, and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed.” (D&C 132:17) It is so important to believe in the power that is in Jesus Christ for those things to come to pass. The Lord knows what is best and will grant unto us what we ask, if it be right. Remember, we must work with God in all we do. And when we do, that is when we see miracles in our daily life. “For with God nothing shall be impossible.” Luke 1:37

On the Third Day He Rose

The last week of the Saviors mortal life was filled with many miracles, teachings, and blessings. It began with his triumphal entry into Jerusalem after which he cleansed the temple and taught many precious truths including the Parable of the 10 Virgins. He instituted the sacrament as an offering of Himself to His disciples while knowing that one of his closest friends would betray Him. He spent the last week of His life showing love to His neighbors only to be rejected and ridiculed by the very same people. What does this teach me about my Savior? That His love is bigger than anything I can comprehend and nothing I can say or do will take it away.

The last days of His life were of most importance. They were the very reason He came to Earth.  They were His mission.  They were vital to each and every person’s existence and salvation who has or ever will come to the earth. In Matthew 26: 36 we read “Then cometh Jesus with them unto a place called Gethsemane, and saith unto the disciples, Sit ye here, while I go and pray yonder.” Jesus was on the brink of the hardest thing He would ever accomplish. He had to do it alone. If another shouldered the pain, the sacrifice would not work. In Mosiah 16:13 we read “...remember that only in and through Christ we are saved.”  

He was foreordained, chosen. In our pre-mortal life we knew that because of the demands of justice we could not return to our beloved Heavenly Father unless those demands could be satisfied. We all shouted for joy when it was announced “But, behold, my Beloved Son, which was my Beloved and Chosen from the beginning, said unto me- Father, thy will be done, and the glory be thine forever.” (Moses 4:2)

Walking to the Garden was no easy task. Jerusalem is built on a hill. The way to Gethsemane was a rocky, uphill, narrow path. It much symbolized the task at hand. Not to mention the meaning of the Garden. Gethsemane means olive press. Olives come in plenty in Jerusalem. But to get the oil, which was a healing ointment, they had to press the olives. Olives were placed on a stone. Another stone was rolled over the top, over and over again, until oil seeped out. It was much like what Christ experienced in the Garden. He too was pressed and squeezed until he blead. The pain was unimaginable. Elder Tad Callister said, “The Savior voluntarily let his humanity take precedence over his divinity…Not once did he raise the shield of godhood in order to soften the blows. Not once did he don the bulletproof vest of divinity. That he also had godly powers did not make his suffering any less excruciating, and less poignant, or any less real. To the contrary, it is for this very reason that his suffering was more, not less, than his mortal counterparts could experience. He took upon him infinite suffering, but chose to defend with only mortal faculties, with but one exception- his godhood was summoned to hold off unconsciousness and death that would otherwise overpower a mere mortal when he reached his threshold of pain. For the Savior, however, there would be no such relief. His divinity would be called upon, not to immunize him from pain, but to enlarge the receptacle that would hold it. He simply brought a larger cut to hold the bitter drink.” (The Infinite Atonement, p119)

As He knelt in the Garden, Jesus prayed, “O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless, not as I will, but as thou wilt.” (Matthew 26:39) Christ knew of the pain he would suffer.  But He also knew He had to do it. He did it because He loved us. Sacrifice is the highest form of love.

Upon completing the first half of his foreordination, He emerged from the Garden to find His disciples asleep. Yet, with love He said, “Rise, let us be going; behold, he is at hand that doth betray me.” (Matthew 26:46) He would be taken into custody by the guards of the high priest and then accused of blasphemy and condemned to death before Pilate. The people did not know Him. They could not see who He was and what He had come to do.

In a song called “Through His Eyes”, I wrote:

While nailed to the tree, with eyes so humble

He forgave the men who caused the trouble

“It is finished” were the last words He spoke

Then closed His eyes and ascended above

He died, my Savior with eyes so pure

That I may use His eyes to see

On the third day after His crucifixion, Christ rose from the tomb. He had overcome death. Not just physical death but spiritual death as well. He had saved all mankind from the terrible fate that would befall them had His mission not been completed. Elder Todd Christofferson said, “By His Atonement and Resurrection, Jesus Christ has overcome all aspects of the Fall…We can have ultimate trust and confidence in His power to overcome all else and grant us everlasting life.” (The Resurrection of Jesus Christ, April 2014) Christ has satisfied the demands of justice that we too may return back to the presence of Heavenly Father and live with both Him and Jesus Christ in the Eternities. He overcoming death has allowed us to accomplish anything, according to Gods will. “For with God nothing shall be impossible.” (Luke 1:37) It is a blessing to know that life doesn’t end when our mortal experience it over. Because of Christ we will continue to live and progress forever. We will continue to experience joy and love as we go about doing good.

In the song “He is Risen” by Cecil Alexander, we sing:

He is risen! He is risen!

He hath opened heaven’s gate.

We are free from sin’s dark prison,

Risen to a holier state.

I am so grateful that I get to live with my Heavenly Father and Savior again, if I do what He has asked so many times: Come unto Me. I know that through the power of the Atonement and Resurrection we are saved from the harshness of what could have been. But because Christ love us so much, He chose to deliver us from that fate. I love Him with all my heart. While conversing with the Apostles, the resurrected Savior gave them this charge, which He also gives to us:

“All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth. Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world.” (Matthew 28:18-20)

I know the Lord is always with us because He loves us and therefor has engraved us upon His palms.